Monday, April 18, 2011

The reason I live...

Knowing you, Jesus, Knowing you. There is no greater thing, you're my all, you're the best. You're my joy my righteousness... and I love you Lord.

Frustrated at how I feel like a football. Frustrated that money is seen as what solves the problem. Frustrated that life doesn't always work in the way you want it to... I need to remember the reason for what I do. Even when ppl r being evil/mean. I need to remember to let pride/self dignity/indignation go, and instead remember that my savior was also humbled.

To remember that my God was not a God who sought to be served, but came to serve.

Focus focus focus!

Saturday, April 16, 2011

an airy fairy post.

Hello happy Friday. Glad its friday tho my life continues without apparent structure...

Life in Singapore has been intense. From meeting people to working on endless projects to pretending to study to thinking bout politics. Intense... i guess the thing that has been illusive was sleep.

People I love... I think that coming back home after a certain time away is always challenging. This has been something that I have been thinking about and thanks to my frog, arrived at some form of peace. Here at home, it is obvious the different paths my loved ones and I have taken,  where similiarities fade and differences become more pronounced. It is easy to judge and wonder what I am in their life. I most definitely do not fit in the everyday life and in the course of these weeks, felt frustrated as a burden...

I am reminded while talking to mr Frog that love is love. yes it is difficult to not judge the choices they have made for their life (esp in light of the crazy life that I have chosen), but my role as their ad hoc friend is to love. And this love does not take the form of telling them what to do, but rather a love that accepts them for who they are. True acceptance requires a lot of grace and humility. Humility to know that I do not have the best answer and grace to live out this knowledge.

Perhaps another element of coming back is the obvious life that I have not chosen. I felt sad for the HDB flat that I might not buy in the new future.. or the conversations on what to do with my CPF, home loan etc  that I will not have. My little tiny dot will become more foreign to me and I will need to again review my role in this place...

Another thing that has captured my attention while I am here is the GE. hehe. I think its fascinating that people are excited (Orchid revolution?!) and that there might be a real fighting chance that something might change. In most of my discussions with people I have met, I have tried to engage them politically and it has been interesting the varied responses. I am scared for the opposition. I hope that some voice will be made that the recent developments in the little red dot is not something that benefits everybody in society.

(ps: the link below makes me sound very legit.. haha Yahoo Article: PM Forum

Democracy.. a very strange word that we are supposed to be. I told mr Frog that one of my biggest contention bout our democracy here in Singapore is that we r supposed to be democratic when we clearly are not ( MPs retiring after 20 yrs of active service without first being elected due to walkovers ) He laughed and said that North Korea is a democracy as well... I guess that for all that the word brings, every country needs to figure out what this mean for them. From my little Political Science lesson 101, western european democracy hinges on  (liberté, égalité, fraternité), determined after the French revolution freedom, egality and brotherhood while in America, only freedom and egality... I wonder how we would define our democracy and what this will look like in time to come.

I like the article about big/small democracy democracy in action.... and was thinking about my work today. We were trying to implement something and the boss took contention with the word "consultative". He essentially said that he had no patience for it and that the individuals are paid to do the job, so why consult.... While making my job potentially harder, I wonder if this is also a potential reflection of the upbringing that my govt has inculcated here in little red dot. As a young "gen y" individual, I personally find it very hard to swallow, to not be given the time to be heard and to potentially be told without asking. Is this perhaps why the young are quite frustrated with the existing situation and have been talking bout change ( at least the netizens)... and my final thought is whether this is "right".. the want of a voice, of being important enough to be consulted with and be taken seriously...

Final thought. If wanting somebody who is happy to do just as they are told... i am wondering why my govt is happy to be so open to just go for it.sending individuals oversees and getting "western education"... Wont it be easier to go with the China model where people are told openly that they are communist and these western thoughts are not applicable to them.

Life's strange. Important to have an anchor in life as one ponders in the amazing different things that the brain absorb.

Good night world and have a happy day.

Wednesday, April 06, 2011

song on repeat...

haha. bit slow. but this is edifying. in helping me not feel so terminal bout life. :)

Monday, April 04, 2011

Noob theologian

—-- Artikel wurde auf meinem iPhone erstellt

Sunday, April 03, 2011

When I Survey the Wondrous Cross

.. In awe of my savior. so many poignant verses.

becos i love Singapore...

While not my eternal home. Singapore is the little red dot where I come from and am terribly proud of. I love the Courtesy Lion (perhaps even the merlion), the Lahs and the singlish.... I am proud of how we r multi cultural, have a temple besides a church and how people try hard to co-exist... And this is why I am extremely fascinated with this year's politics.

Some current thoughts while listening to the debate

- Based on the individuals speaking yesterday, SDP and WP get my votes. They r coherent and articulate and know what our issues are. They are passionate to make Singapore a better place and I think that they reflect what I think are lacking in our PAP policies.

- I hope to think there r good people in PAP. I like Tharman and thinks he was likable as well.  I hope to think that there can be change from within and it might become a more fair system for more singaporeans.

- I am not sure that democracy is the best solution. But I guess if we are called a democracy, we should be given a fair playing field to go for it...

Am excited for Election day! :)